So Where's the Copy?

I admit, I have to search widely for interactive ads that cry out for a makeover. Still, there always seems to be a plentiful supply of examples of advertising folly. And while the percentage of such ads may be small, the dollar waste is huge.

The latest example is one that I found in a recent issue of The Wall Street Journal, an ad for the worldwide chain of Mandarin Oriental Hotels. It's presumably one of a series.

Here's the chain's online description of the campaign's plan and purpose: “Mandarin Oriental Hotel Group's international advertising campaign simply and elegantly connects the Group's well recognized symbol — the fan — with international celebrities who regularly stay at the hotels and consider themselves to be fans of the Group. All of the celebrities featured were photographed by world-famous photographer, the late Lord Lichfield, in a location of their choice and which, for them, best represents the feeling of well-being. Each fan has chosen a charity to which Mandarin Oriental is delighted to have made a donation of USD 10,000.”

The “international celebrities” include such luminaries as Jane Seymour, Lance Armstrong, I.M. Pei and Zubin Mehta, but also Vivienne Tam, Maggie Cheung and Michelle Yeoh. You do remember them, don't you?

Now, it's hard to find fault with the copy…because there isn't any. We see Lord Lichfield's photographic portrait of Ms. Seymour, the words “She's a fan” and Mandarin Oriental's fan-shaped logo. And that's it.

Insatiably curious readers will keep searching until they discover two lines of 4-point type at the bottom: “To find out why Jane Seymour is a fan, visit www.mandarinoriental.com,” followed by a list of cities in which the hotels are located.

Great! I thought. At least on the Web site I'll find one of my favorite selling methods being used — a vivid, credible, richly detailed testimonial by a delighted customer which will do the selling job better than any copywriter could.

No such luck. The address leads to an effective but bland home page which could be that of any international hotel chain, with links to slide shows on such subjects as vacations and weddings.

One other link says “Our Fans. Find out why….” This takes us to the photo gallery of international celebrity endorsers. Clicking on any one brings up a large photo, and at last the endorsement.

But then the endorsement turns out to be so vague and phony as to be almost worthless. “Jane and her family love to travel the world and whenever she can, she makes Mandarin Oriental her second home.” Oh.

Once again we witness the insipidity of an ad series that sounds so great during the PowerPoint presentation in the conference room but turns out to be just a waste of money.

But what was the alternative? Let's take a look.

First of all, an opportunity was presented to make use of one of what I have called the Ultimate Benefits. These are primitive benefits valued by cave dwellers hundreds of thousands of years ago and still lingering deep in our psyches. The desire for comfort. Safety. Satisfaction of hunger. Peace of mind. Immortality. A sense of superiority. Adventure.

The last two could have been appealed to in this case by the eloquent celebrity endorsements. If Jane Seymour endorsed Toyota, it would be perceived by skeptical consumers as meaningless puffery. But if she really loves staying at a Mandarin Oriental hotel, and could really convey this in convincing detail, right away there'd be a gain in credibility.

And what if the ad featured more than one celebrity? And what if the headline suggested the possibility of running into and getting to know one such celebrated guest during your own stay there?

Aha! Now we have the makings of an appeal to the universal desire for superiority and adventure. (When you rub elbows with someone superior, some of that superiority rubs off on you in the form of bragging rights.) That's what I have incorporated in my makeover. I've included the photos of two celebrities and the names of more to convey the increased likelihood that you might run into somebody famous on the tennis court. I also have included the cities where the hotels are located, in case you're planning to visit one of them, and the chain's basic selling proposition or unique identity as presented on its Web site.

With the rare exception of a bolt of ad lightning like Bill Bernbach's classic “Think Small” Volkswagen ad, effective print advertising should strive for a delicate balance between saying too little and saying too much. Say too little, and you deprive the reader of valuable points that might tip the scales toward a sale. Try to say and show too much, and you risk making your ad crowded, unattractive, uninviting and unreadable.

I've reached for this kind of balance in my makeover. I believe it would have given Mandarin Oriental much more for its ad money than just a picture of a star and a fan.

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THOMAS L. COLLINS (thomas.l.collins@verizon.net) is an independent creative and marketing consultant based in Portland, OR.